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A Friendly Rumor (Spongebob Squarepants Fanfiction)
A Friendly Rumor (Spongebob Squarepants Fanfiction) Synopsis Spongebob begins to get all worked up after a possible rumor about him is spreading that was either started by Patrick or Sandy. Plot The story begins at Spongebob's Pineapple, one beautiful Summer evening, the Sun's still out, kids are playing, fish including Squidward are sunbathing and pretty much what you’d normally expect during the Summer Time. Pineapple door opens. SPONGEBOB: I’M READY! And this guy… Gary slithers up. GARY: Meow SPONGEBOB: Ready for what? Oh yeah! I’m ready, to PARTAE! GARY: Meow SPONGEBOB: By Partae, I am going to the Ice Cream Float with Patrick and Sandy, to get, you know… ice cream! GARY: Meow SPONGEBOB: Gary, you’re lactose intolerant, you don’t even like ice cream! GARY: Meow SPONGEBOB: Well anyways, I gotta get going, I see Patrick and Sandy waiting right now! GARY: Meow SPONGEBOB: I’ll buy you snail food later, okay, see ya! Spongebob scampers off, Gary slithers up to the roof and sunbathes up there. Spongebob approaches Patrick and Sandy. SPONGEBOB: Hey Patrick and Sandy! PATRICK: Hi Spongebob! SANDY: Howdy! SPONGEBOB: So, ya ready for some Ice Cream! SANDY: As ready as a cow grazing for grass on the middle of an Oklahoma plain! SPONGEBOB: Huh? SANDY: Ice Cream time! SPONGEBOB: That's the spirit! How about you, Pat? PATRICK: Will they serve the Patrick Star Surprise?! SPONGEBOB: Yea PATRICK: Then let's go! As the three friends begin to head for the ice cream float, they hear some laughing and turn to see two teenagers pointing and giggling at Spongebob. SPONGEBOB: Ummm? May I help you young kids? TEEN#1: Help from a brine shrimp, no way! TEEN#2: Like, not cool. SPONGEBOB: Wait, why’d you call me a brine shrimp? TEEN#1: You got feathers in your brain? Everybody in town thinks you’re one. TEEN#2: Like, definitely. Spongebob, Patrick and Sandy hear some input from a couple of others. HAROLD: Yeah NANCY: Seems accurate. SQUIDWARD: Whatever. Back to the situation. SANDY: How did you obtain this rumor? TEEN#1: Really, ya think I be talking to his friends which be a dumb southern squirrel, YEE-HAW! And a fat pink butthole who may have never had a girlfriend yet. PATRICK: Girl? I did talk to a girl! She's my mom! TEEN#1: Ha! Loser! Mommy's Boy! TEEN#2: Like, definitely. TEEN#1: Shut up. The two teens leave continuing to giggle. The three are shocked. The scene cuts to Ice Cream Float, the three wait for their ice cream while still trying to process what had just happened. SPONGEBOB: I just don’t get it, how can a rumor like that be passed around and be taken for real, I was never a brine shrimp! After High School! PATRICK: I don’t know! The Ice Cream arrives. PATRICK: Hey Ice cream! SPONGEBOB: Pat! PATRICK: Sorry BUBBLE BASS: Ya gotta agree that whoever this rumor person is, keeps it real, and is funny. SPONGEBOB: Bubble Bass! When did you start working here? BUBBLE BASS: I got out of jail after you and your little old heroes busted me at the Nerd store before! I got a job here! Now back to the matter at hand, those teens were right, Spongebob is a brine shrimp! SPONGEBOB: Wait, you weren’t there when that happened. BUBBLE BASS: Don’t judge my powers, since the pink butthole and the southerner won’t get it. Sandy gets up and steps on Bubble Bass’ feet with her cleats making him yelp in pain. He hops away with his butt. SANDY: Jerk.. SPONGEBOB: Not surprising. PATRICK: Can we go now.. I already finished all your meals. They look to see that happened. SPONGEBOB: Poo Patrick gets up to leave, Spongebob gets suspicious. SPONGEBOB: Hey wait a sec, Pat, are you the rumorer? PATRICK: The ruma what? Spongebob gets up in a tense fashion. SPONGEBOB: Don’t play stupid. Did you make the rumors? PATRICK: No! I don’t have the intelligence to do that! You know that I was diagnosed with 97% stupidity right? SPONGEBOB: Your sudden usage of big words says otherwise… PATRICK: I made no rumors! Maybe Sandy did! SANDY: I did not! PATRICK: Did too! SPONGEBOB: Hold up! One of you is lying and you gotta come clean now so we can solve this issue. SANDY: I’m telling the truth Spongebob! I am! I am! SPONGEBOB: Pat? PATRICK: Uhhhhhhhhhh… what were we arguing about again? Before Spongebob could question further, Old Man Jenkins approaches them. OLD MAN JENKINS: Hey young chaps, what's sizzlin? SPONGEBOB: Not now Old Man Jenkins, I’m trying to see which one of my friends here talked behind my back. SANDY: And who says sizzlin? OLD MAN JENKINS: My apologies, carry on, just was passing by, cheerio. Old Man Jenkins simply walks off. PATRICK: I didn’t know he was British! SPONGEBOB: Trying to distract me from the real problem at hand, huh? PATRICK: I did not make no rumor! SANDY: Now, stop arguing, both of you! The only way we can see who is lying and who is honest, is to take this in a calm and dignified manner. Let's go to my treedome and use my Lie Detector. PATRICK: Are we going to hook up wires to our brains?!! SANDY: No PATRICK: Awwww The three leave. BUBBLE BASS: Hey! You gotta pay up plus tip! Spongebob throws over $5. BUBBLE BASS: Pfft, cheapskate. The scene transitions to Sandy's treedome, Patrick is hooked up to the lie detector. SANDY: Now Pat, all you have to do is stick your tongue on this detector made of stainless steel. PATRICK: That doesn’t sound edible. SANDY: Stick! Patrick obliged. SANDY: Now, did you make the brine shrimp rumor? PATRICK(muffled): Ii didd nott! A piece of paper is then printed out as Patrick's result, he was telling the truth. SANDY: Okay, you’re good. PATRICK: That detector tasted like my Dad's pipe supplies. SANDY: Okay, my turn. Sandy sticks her tongue to the detector. SANDY(muffled): Ii ammm innoccent. She has told the truth as well. SPONGEBOB: Well fine, if you didn’t make the rumors, then who else did? SANDY: Better question, why are we making such a big deal over a little issue a couple of punk kids came up with? SPONGEBOB: The whole town knows is what bothers me. SANDY: Well, we need to learn to not take others seriously. PATRICK: Can we go now, I’m bored! After Sandy gets back into her suit, the three friends exit to the outside. SPONGEBOB: I’ll try Sandy, I’ll try to not care what others think. The same teens plus Don The Whale pass by. TEEN#1: Briney! TEEN#2: What he said! DON THE WHALE: Briney, get the southerner and the pink hybrid elephant to come clean my dishes! Whoop! Whoop! They leave. Sandy is now fuming with rage. SANDY: THAT IS IT! THIS IS WHERE WE DRAW THE LINE!! SPONGEBOB: So how do we nab the rumorer? SANDY: I propose a stakeout, at Goo Lagoon, because, they have that pop culture board remember. PATRICK: That same board that we called Plankton, a tiny one eyed dwarf on?! That's still there?! Cool! Plankton pops up. PLANKTON: At least I don’t smell like gasoline! Which you do! Patrick simply flicks Plankton away. PLANKTON: I’ll destroy all of you! He lands into a garbage can. SPONGEBOB: Stakeout away! PATRICK: Nice Mermaidman reference! The scene cuts to Goo Lagoon, night has fallen, almost everyone has turned in for the night, except our three heroes and some nightguards. NIGHTGUARD#1: Wanna leave. NIGHTGUARD#2: Can’t, working the graveyard shift. NIGHTGUARD#1: Every Fishsons Ever is on! NIGHTGUARD#2: Not interested. The guards continue watch while beginning to doze off. SANDY: Dag nab it! How are we going to get past these guys? SPONGEBOB: I don’t know. PATRICK: I do! Patrick sneaks away which concerns Spongebob and Sandy. The guards are nearly asleep. Patrick climbs up top the pop culture board and drops two coconuts onto them, one head each, knocking them unconscious. SANDY: That's illegal! PATRICK: Never underestimate the coconut show! SPONGEBOB: Just drop it! Let's get to the mission ahead. The three friends search the pop culture board. They find stuff such as “Patrick smells like Gasoline,” PATRICK: Hey! And others such as “Paco Rhymes With Taco,” “Squidward Stinks,” “Patchy The Freak,” and “Clown Lives Matter.” SANDY: Drat, nothing! SPONGEBOB: Don’t speak so soon! Look! Spongebob points to all of the culture just read. SPONGEBOB: They are all signed by one person…… “OMJ?” PATRICK: Is OMJ, Oh My Jelly Donuts?! OLD MAN JENKINS: No, that be me. The three friends turn to see Old Man Jenkins, standing there in a brown trenchcoat and carrying a lantern just staring at them and acting very sketchy. SPONGEBOB: Old Man Jenkins?! SANDY: You’re the rumorer?! PATRICK: I do not smell like gasoline! OLD MAN JENKINS: I’m sorry that this got out of hand, young chaps, I just be trying to make fun among the newer generations. SPONGEBOB: There's other ways to be funny! Insulting people isn’t one of them! SANDY: You’re lucky you’re an old man, otherwise I would karate kick you out of this galaxy! PATRICK: I’ll agree with one thing though! Squidward does stink! Really bad! OLD MAN JENKINS: Thanks Patrick…. and no I am not an old man Sandra. SANDY: What do you mean? OLD MAN JENKINS: You’ll find out right now. The three friends stare at him, confused. Old Man Jenkins then bursts revealing himself to be the gorilla from “I Had An Accident.” SANDY (Gasps): THE GORILLA!!! The Gorilla makes his angry monkey sounds again and grabs all three screaming friends, ready for another round of WWE. He stuffs them in a sack and begins throwing them around and beating on them using such techniques as punching, kicking, dropkicking, the clothesline, chair destruction and all out war. SPONGEBOB: I thought we were done with this psycho! SANDY: Now he wants his revenge for foiling his evil plan from before! PATRICK: He will taste my.. The Gorilla punches harder into the sack to make them shut up. SPONGEBOB, PATRICK AND SANDY: OWWWWWW!!!! The Gorilla makes his angry monkey sounds again. SPONGEBOB: Oh man, this monster is going to annihilate us! PATRICK: I want my Mommy!! SANDY: Get ahold of yourselves cowards! Instead of letting an 8 foot tall hairy monster bagging and beating us down like on WWE, how about we fight back with Kah-Rae-Tae! SPONGEBOB: But I only earned the Yellow Belt! PATRICK: And I only know kung-fu! SANDY: Just follow my lead! The Gorilla continues to hop on the sack like a child bouncing. Suddenly, Sandy karate chops the gorilla in a very painful area. He screams with more angrier monkey sounds. Sandy escapes the sack and begins going to town on the huge monkey. SANDY: Take this you hairy ugly faced evil apeman! The Gorilla fights back but Sandy, who finally got the courage to stand up to this guy, continues beating him down and winning hard. Finally, the gorilla gives up and runs away climbing onto a bus. GORILLA: Step on it! There's a maniac worse than myself after me! BUS DRIVER: Hold up! 3 fare! The Gorilla pays the bus driver 3 cents and then the bus drives off as Sandy, Spongebob and Patrick watch. They finally get their composure back. SANDY: Well, that escalated quickly! SPONGEBOB: It's not everyday that you are subject to false rumors made by a hairy ape disguised as the unluckiest old man in town. There's a lesson to you, never lie about others and always have each other's back, especially if you meet an insane monkey. PATRICK: Well, mystery solved! Now can we get pizza?! SPONGEBOB: But you have leftovers at your house from before! PATRICK: Oh….. SANDY: What a day… PATRICK: Night! Sandy gives a “You serious” look to Patrick making him back down. SPONGEBOB: Yep, what a night. Characters Spongebob Squarepants Gary The Snail Patrick Star Sandy Cheeks Two Teenagers Harold Nancy Suzy Fish (Nancy) Squidward Tentacles Bubble Bass Old Man Jenkins(Disguise Only) Don The Whale Sheldon J. Plankton Two Nightguards Gorilla Bus Driver Category:SquidwardTentacles35